Oh, What Gorgeous Hair!: "stupidly long, blond hair"
Eyes Like...: No idea
Sue-type: Back Alley Sue
Of Course, She Owns...: A lot of modern terms
I Didn't Know He Had a Sister/Cousin!: N/A
She's From Where?: Don't know
Whose Girlfriend is She, Anyway?: Racetrack's
Notes:The spelling and accent get worse as the story progresses, she keeps using very anachronistic terms, and she doesn't really follow any sense of logic. In one chapter she claims her mother died in child birth and in another she talks about a story her mother used to read to her. Not to mention, nothing actually happens in this story! Zip! Zilch! Nada!
"Well, if you want you can stay in the empty bunk.. That is if you don't mind staying in a room with a ton of boys." He told me.
I thought for a quick second before answering him. "Definintly." I mean seriously... stay in a room with a bunch of hot guys? Duh.
So in her Sue World not only do girls and boys sleep in the same room/bed all the time in the 1800s, but they also refer to guys as being "hot" and say "Duh."
"Well 'dis is fun." I told him as we slowly moved forward. I could hear the Delancy brothers yelling at some random kid. He looked really young and defenseless until he punched Morris in the face.
I laughed at this and Jack just kinda looked at me fuuny. 'I guess he didn't see the boy punch Morris.' I thought to myself.
"Whatda laughing about?" Jack asked me.
"Ummmm...some random kid punched Morris in the face."
This is her very first day of selling papers ever...yet she knows who the Delancey Bros. and can recognize them?!?!?
"Are youse toiking steriods?" I asked him still trying to push him off.
More anachronistic references!
Finally, I have to include three different excerpts here to clear up the mystery of Artemesia's mother:
(1) "Artemsia . " I answered him. I loved that name and it was my grandma’s and her grandma’s and the one before that! We were just a brood of Artemsias.
(2) "Well my fatha , he died in a factory accident 1 month before I was born and my mudda, she died in child birth. I was sent off to a orphanage in Manhattan by the family in the next apartment.
(3) "I don't really knows. Maybe 'cause of a book my mudda once read to me..."
Excerpt (1) would indicate that she knew her parents (or one of them at least), since she knew after whom she was named. Excerpt (2), though, claims that not only did both of her parents die before she could really meet them, but she was sent to an orphanage by another family. Yet in Excerpt (3) she claims that she remembers her mother reading to her. Which is it, Artermesia?
Best Line: I looked up to see one of those hoity-toity ladies. The ones that would laugh at me and try to explain that my husband couldn't do that to me. They would laugh because of what I'm wearing or that I'm a newsie. Then they would see any brusies I had and try to tell me about my husand. It was like a double insult and no matter what, they never believe me. I usually go with the old, 'Youse should see what de otha guy loiks like.' Does this line even make sense?